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Birth Control and Ephedra? [31 May 2006|03:09pm]

Hello all. I am currently taking Ortho Tri-Cyclen Lo birth control.. This is my 3rd month on it. I also recently started taking my Stacker 2s with ephedra [I know.. I know.]. Is it REALLY bad to take them both together? Does anybody know? I really want to take my Stackers but I don't want to like..die. = \ Any imput? Thanks. [=

x-posted like woah... sorry.
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HELP!! [01 Jul 2004|12:17am]

So i was just purging and my nose started bleeding. thats never happened to me before so i was just wondering if thats happened to anyone else or if anyone knows if the purging was possibly the cause. i know this is gross so i'm sorry. but i'm trying to figure out what the cause was cuz i used to get nose bleeds all the time but its been like 8 years. thanks in advance for you help.
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Carving Ana's name.. [23 Jun 2004|10:36pm]

I want to show my undying love for Ana by carving her name into the skin by my hip.. Since I’m not SI I’m wondering if there’s a way to do that without much pain or blood. Thanks so much. <3
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Cavity? [06 Jun 2004|10:25am]

Does having an eating disorder affect the amount of cavities you have? I just went to the dentist and I had 6!!!! I've only had about 2 others my whole life.. So I don't know what's up.. I don't even eat sweets or anything and I brush my teeth in the morning and I floss and brush at night.. I dunno what happened.. Any ideas would help.. ThanksS.

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[22 May 2004|09:19am]

my new thinspiration: gabbie.

(my best friend/ex's girlfriend, aka my replacement. ribs and all.)
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[14 May 2004|07:39pm]

tomorrow night i am making an appearance at the track house. my ex will be there. he is graduating. i have to be stunning. however, i have fucked up and been on a constant binge since finals have kicked in. IS THERE ANY WAY I CAN REDUCE MY FLABBINESS AND BLOATEDNESS FOR TOMORROW NIGHT? anything that will absorb my water weight but not make me pass out after a few drinks? anything that will make my jeans (a kids size 16) not as tight as they are right now??


[this might wind up x-posted]
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[13 May 2004|10:59am]

Who wants to do a little contest? Let's see who can lose the most weight in 15 days, from the 15th to the 30th. Won't that be fun? Can I get a stats check from everyone, please?
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[11 May 2004|08:51pm]

[ mood | depressed ]

Atkins is leaving. I've gained six pounds. Back to broth and cabbage.

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[09 May 2004|09:42pm]

I'm sorry for the cross post, but I can't find any old posts about this.
Exactly WHAT is with the chocolate diet?
How much, how often?
I got a lot of chocolate the other day, but I'm still worried I'll mess it up.
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[07 May 2004|09:09am]

Where did the pro-ana community go?
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what? [05 May 2004|12:21am]

[ mood | confused ]

I went home this weekend for job interviews for the summer. they went well. however, the eating situation did not. i ate A LOT. and A LOT of crap at that. going home for the summer is gonna make everything harder. at least my parents are trying to loose weight so they'll buy low fat stuff. and i told my mom that i am now vegetarian so that'll be ok. eh. she still likes to give me bad food though. like today, she went somewhere to get directions and came back to the car with cookies for me. great mom. just great. of course i ate one. ugh!

ne way. so i just weighed myself. how is it possible that i was 146 and then after i peed i was 148???!?!?!? someone explain that!

oh livejournal. you truly are the devil. i should be studying but i continue to write.

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[04 May 2004|03:58pm]

::swallowing laxatives::
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dead and bloated. [04 May 2004|03:49pm]


the rents sent me a care package. which is super, because i feel unloved if they don't do stuff like that for me. which makes me sad.

the rents sent me a care package. which is horrible, because i ate a lot of the oreos (48 since yesterday) and am growing and growing and growing and growing and growing.

until i pop, a balloon of vomit.

only my throat hurts and i cannot puke.

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[03 May 2004|08:36pm]

[ mood | fat ]

Why is it that i want to eat after i purge? the whole point of purging is to get it out. but as soon as it is, i want to eat more!! wtf?!
so i fasted for 27 hours then ate 2 mini (as in about 4" in diameter) cheese quesadillas and an apple cinnamon rice cake. i don't even know how many cals that is but i purged it anyway. ugh...
on a good note, i have a job interview tomorrow for 2 clothing stores. i hope i get one cuz that would be inspiration and a time killer that gives me money!! i think its gonna be really hard to fast and everything once i get home from school. at school it doesn't matter. my roomie isn't watching what i eat and stuff. but if i continually turn down food my mom will get weird about it. ah. we'll see what happens.

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[03 May 2004|11:40am]

[ mood | dirty ]

I have been binging non-stop for four days. BAD binging. Ice cream, Pringles, RAMEN. I had three packs of ramen in a day. You see, I'm going home for the summer, and my trip home was delayed cause of this crazy bad weather, and I'm low on funds with no food in my kitchen 'cause I was supposed to leave. you know? So I end up making midnight runs to Winn Dixie and Wal-Mart while starving and buying bad, cheap food. And no, I haven't purged at all. Tor e up the inside of my wrist with my house key, but no purging.

And here's the truly fucked-up part.


.....so fucked up.....

On another note, go buy a fashion magazine called Zink. They did the Cirque de Souil (something like that, I don't know the spelling)this issue and it is THE GREATEST THINSPIRATION. The ENTIRE MAGAZINE. Hot guys, skinny girls, love love LOVE. It's like four bucks. You'll find it at Books-A-Million or Barnes and Noble. GO!

On another note, Britney Spears, in an interview with Marie Claire, said she wanted to lose 10 pounds.

::stunned silence::

I can't fucking believe that. She's like, every guys wet dream of perfection and she wants to lose 10 pounds. Fuck. Fuck her. What does she weigh now, anyway?

Poll: I think Christina Aguilera 'gained' weight last fall to hide breast implants. Her arms are skinny again, but her boobs are still big...and I should know, when you're short and weigh below 140 pounds, you have no boobs. Well, you have little boobs and push-up bras, but this girl is hanging out of her tube tops.

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[03 May 2004|10:33am]

liquid fast til thursday.

but since i ate some vegan peanut chews when i was high as a kite last night, let's make it go until friday.

i'm allowing myself really anything that is liquid.

the idea is that i won't go over 1000 calories. it will curb my bingeing.

broth, tea, diet soda, cranberry juice, soy milk.

i will reduce myself to merely my roles as friend, girlfriend, daughter, student, activist, writer, and anything else that is not related to NEEDFUL BODY.

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2nd Post (late coming I know) [30 Apr 2004|04:45pm]

[ mood | cranky ]

Sorry I haven't been posting, I'm just pretty disgusted with myself and the way that I've been acting.

I should be dead by now. 4 years? I'm "clinical". Four years of severe restricting and purging what I did eat, to binge and purge, back to restricting with the occasional binge. (I've stopped purging as much as I had) I've never reached a clinical weight, thus I've never lost my period. My ribs kind of stick out. My hipbones stick out. When I eat my stomach is so stretched from ANYTHING that it takes on a grotesque appearance.

I'm really messed up in the head, and I've got a lot of the physical symptoms: anemia, cold all the time, languo, and the hair on my head is thinning. But I still can't lose this damn weight. I'm at a cross roads right now. I'm tired of being sick. I'm tired of not being able to live my life, but damnit, do I really want to give up when I've worked this hard and still haven't achieved my goal? What does that say about me? That I'm not trying hard enough? That I'm a loser?

I don't know.

I'm tired of being sick, but I don't want to give up such a large part of me, and frankly I don't want to stop before I reach my goal, but what if I do, and then I can't stop?

I'm going to go sleep now. That way I won't have to add to the approx. 500 cals (not really a lot of volume) that I've had today. I have to wear a leotard tomorrow and I don't want to think about it.

Thanks for listening to my rambles.

Stats for referenceCollapse )

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Update Schmupdate [30 Apr 2004|11:30am]

I fasted 26 hours. My goal was 36 so thats no good. i definitely b/p'ed last night. oh man. then after writing about it in my journal, i proceeded to finish the bag of chips!!! WHO AM I?!?!? oh man oh man. so fast starting right now. 11:30. hope i can do it. also, i'm down to 145!! yay!!
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[28 Jan 2004|04:08pm]

...this is bullshit.
ill tell you all AGAIN.
you have to request to join the membership on the community info.
do it, or you cant be part of the community. this is my third fucking post about this.
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There is a fine line between art and vandalism (x-post) [28 Apr 2004|12:46pm]

This is my purging bathroom, and my version of art therapy.

Even little green army men fight with the mirror...Collapse )
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